Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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