At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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