i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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