I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
