rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
