You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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