i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
