she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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