Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
this will be a night to untag.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize