apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
