But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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