That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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