But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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