in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
