Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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