i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
