just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
