I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize
