so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
