If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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