Soap is not a condiment
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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