Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
