Porn is love you can see.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
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