Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
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