You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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