you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
