they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
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And the cops told us we were all naked.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
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Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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