I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
it's like iHOP with fire
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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