sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
