I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
