Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
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Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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