Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
