This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I just want nice things and good sex
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
