I faked an abortion last night.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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