are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
