you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum