i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
