You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
