We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Randomize
