please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize