So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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