I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
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