I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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