I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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