i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize
