FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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