If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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