He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
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