okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
