He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
