been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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