: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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